If your body has a lot of pain and your mind always seems distressed, can it truly bring Relief to stop treating your body-mind like it's the enemy?
ReliefNow-121-Key #2 - Be WITH+IN Our Body… It’s a “Love Relationship”
[00:00:00] Do you treat your body and feel that your body is an enemy that has betrayed you, that is keeping you from living the life that you want to lead when it's in pain? Do you feel like it's attacking you? I'm Rick from Thriving Now, and this particular subject is really dear to me, and in the next few minutes I want to share with you some.
[00:00:27] Concepts that I believe if I understood them back when I was dealing with a, a traumatized body that would had a lot of pain, that it would've been helpful to me to know that if I had had EFT tapping back then, that it would've given me some doorways of shifting things that might have taken weeks or a couple of months to make real progress rather than the years that it did take.
[00:00:54] So here we go. Imagine you're walking down a street and suddenly it feels like something has bit you in the butt. What happens in your body? Well, obviously there's nerves and reactions, a cascade of reactions that suddenly happen. The assumption by your primitive brain is that I am under attack, because if that is true, Guess what?
[00:01:25] You need to either defend yourself, fight, you need to run flight, or eh, not sure exactly what to do. Freeze. Here's the thing. What if that feeling of being bitten in the butt comes from a herniated disc like it did for me after a skiing accident, and I'd be walking along or walking up the steps and. My whole body would react and after a, after a year and a half of that before my surgery, wow.
[00:02:02] I really started to disconnect from my body and I started to feel that my body was something separate from me, that it could attack me at any time. That it was keeping me from living the life that I. I wanted to live into doing the work in the world to pay the bills and everything else that I needed to do, and this was on top of other disconnects.
[00:02:28] We call that dissociation. It's where the parts of us that need to survive. If the pain is there, it creates distance, it creates separation, it'll numb out, it'll make it something separate. But here's the thing, just taking a step back, we can see that if you're walking down the street and there wasn't actually a lion that grabbed you in the butt, that it was something inside of you that any reaction that you have as if you're being attacked is not helpful.
[00:03:09] Now, those of us who have ever had a chronic condition know that. It wears you down, and I, part of why it wears you down is this separation I've found, because instead of being able to tune in and be with and be in your body, you leave or you numb out, or you ignore, or you get angry with. And if you imagine a small child that you got angry with every time it was hurting, or you just left the room, oh, you're hurting, you're crying, you're scared, I'm outta here.
[00:03:59] We know that that would not be helpful and yet, Fundamentally inside of our nervous system, inside of our primitive brain, the part of us that needs to survive an attack. That's the type of thing that happens. So what are we going to do? Well, so this key is we need to repair any disconnections. And we also need to reframe, look at this relationship of you to your body again, and start building loving trust, starting now.
[00:04:41] And we can do it. We can do it together. And I think it can even be fun. And I will, I will say to you that as I look back at my history, you know, I had traumas going all the way back into early childhood, a hernia and a surgery. I had accidents. There was even sexual abuse in my early teenage years. There were all kinds of things that I think.
[00:05:09] A lot of us share that disconnected me from my body. I, I think there's a, there's a time period where I started seeing that my, my body and I really didn't have the same kind of relationship, was starting to create that separation and it got bigger and bigger until actually my body was dying, literally dying of something that they said was incurable.
[00:05:36] It wasn't. But it required that I come back into my body, that I listen more deeply. And in that process, my body started responding. I became stronger, I became more alive and sensual. I was able to do things and even start dancing in ways that I never would've thought possible. And even today, even with the.
[00:06:04] Bit of my inherited neck challenges. I know that my neck is here with me, supporting me, supporting me being in this work, supporting me, being here with you. It is the one aspect that you know, my body is here till death to us part yours too. And so let's begin, and with the intention of bringing relief now and with a longer term vision toward a life where you really do get to feel your body integrated from head to toe and willing and able and trusting in this, this thriving life.
[00:07:01] All right. Let's do it.
Be WITH+IN Our Body... It's a "Love Relationship"
Pain and trauma can take us out of our body, disconnecting us from our natural capacity to comfort and heal. Too often we treat our body-mind with hate and disgust... yet our heart still keeps beating and our nervous system keeps trying its best to help us survive. That's devotion.
There's love there, even if not reflected (yet!) in our attitude towards the parts of us that seem to be inflicting distress on us and "ruining our life." When we treat the parts of us that need relief with respect... and even a bit of curiosity and care... we ease the inner conflict that otherwise causes loud and painful suffering.
Yes, it brings HUGE Relief to the body to be treated as a loved friend and trusted lifelong companion... and Here's Why...
If "someone" poked and pinched you all the time, and you felt bruised and abused by them, it would make total sense to:
- Want them to STOP and GO AWAY!
- Not trust them and feel they are ruining your life, your peace, your well-being.
- Ignore them as much as possible and get angry and resentful when you couldn't ignore the pain they were causing.
Here's the problem. Your body isn't a "them." It just can feel like it is.
Humans have evolved ways of coping with trauma and injury. One of those ways is to dissociate. We separate out the part of us that is in overwhelming distress from the rest of us. And we keep going. And going. And going. In our culture, we often do not get the time and skilled support to re-connect and heal. The dissociation becomes chronic, and pain moves into suffering. Ouch.
To heal deeply and completely, we need to repair the connection. And, we need an empowering attitude -- a frame of reference towards our body -- that lets us feel what we need to feel and let out what needs to be let out and discover all the many ways we can shift, move, nourish, and cleanse our body-mind so it can find Relief NOW. And again. And again. Whenever relief is needed!