by Rick Wilkes, Emotional Freedom Coach
Thousands of people rejected me… and that was just in the past week! I put my heart and soul into what I put out into the world, what Cathy and I publish on our website, into what we offer to you — our newsletter readers and web visitors. Millions of people have viewed the Thriving Now website. And every single week, week after week, thousands and THOUSANDS of people reject me… They say NO.
We are grateful and delighted with all the responses we get from the people who look forward to our email… who say “God, this arrived at just the right time and made a big difference in my life!” We have wonderful readers on our lists, and clients who find our products perfect for them.
But not everyone has time to read… They say NOT NOW. And we do get responses from people who find EFT or our approach outside their comfort level.. They say, YOU’RE TOO WEIRD! They act as if I have nothing whatsoever to offer them. Some insist I’m too expensive. Others believe I’m too cheap to actually be worth anything. I generously give energy only to never hear from them again. Or they mark my emails as SPAM! Can you imagine??!?!
They reject me. And that’s okay. The world is abundant, and each person gets to select the avenue that feels right for them. Selection and rejection allow us to filter and find the best matches for us and them.
Of course, a part of my brain doesn’t think rejection is EVER okay. It remembers a time long, long ago when… for my ancestors… being rejected meant… starvation, coldness, lack. Rejection by an influential person in your birth tribe was unsafe.
The concept that you can be rejected by thousands, every week, and still be THRIVING… The primitive brain does NOT get that. Can you feel it? Just the word rejection evokes a sense of fear in our gut.
Yet, the world today gives us opportunities to connect, love, and mutually appreciate people literally half a world away. That means that our more primitive perceptions haven’t yet evolved to reflect our true freedom and abundance. There is no way for us to interact with all of those people, or them with us… we need to be selective! The good news is that we can consciously choose to help ourselves.
We can intentionally TRANSFORM our emotional responses… including our response to rejection.
And that’s my mission. To help people transform their emotional world so they can live, laugh, and love with confidence. What that means to me is being able to break out of the shell that our Old World Beliefs keep us trapped in.
Let’s take handling rejection. After we quiet the emotional noise, after we’ve used EFT Tapping to clear the old traumas where we felt rejected, what evolves is a new perspective. It is a perspective that sees people’s choices as worth celebrating. Those who say NO leave room for those who feel YES! Don’t they?
It is a new perspective that honors that we all have preferences and choices of our own. As we say YES to this, are indeed saying NO to that and that and that and a million other things, too. That’s good! It’s the foundation of freedom…
Yet, as I coach people about their most awkward situations, they often boil down to a feeling of guilt in saying NO to others… and a feeling that we’re “unworthy” or “not good enough” and “unwanted” when others say NO to us. What an icky way to live.
That is why we’re focusing on feeling at peace giving and receiving NO’s… so we can explore the limitless edges of YES… with confidence and emotional resilience.
Can you imagine how good that can feel? To know… from head to toe… in your heart and in your gut… rejection is a wholesome and healthy part of life in today’s world.
Indeed, I’ve come up with a new expression to describe it: Divine Filtering
We hope you find the ideas intriguing. Even more, we hope you can put them to PRACTICAL use in your life, to help restructure your reactions to others so you feel strong, steady, and able to engage with life with authentic confidence.
Cathy and I were joined by relationship coach Reid Mihalko as we explored these topics with a growing tribe of people who WANT to break out of their shell… NOW. The calls were recorded and are available NOW. If this feels like a YES to you, you can sign up at the link below.
https://www.thrivingnow.com/breaking-out-of-shell/
And to the thousands and thousands of you who won’t read this, or won’t read this far, or won’t feel it is a YES for you right now, it’s cool… I deeply and completely accept you anyway. <wink>
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Here is some EFT Tapping to help you get started shifting your reaction about rejection right now.
Karate Chop: Even though they rejected me, I choose to feel surprisingly calm and confident anyway.
Even though I felt rejected back then, I am starting to see how that opens up new possibilities for me NOW.
Even though they rejected me, and that hurts, I am in the process of being okay with “NO”… while being pleasingly focused on MY YES.
Top of the Head: They rejected me.
Eyebrow: That hurt.
Side of the Eye: They rejected me.
Under the Eye: That definitely hurt.
Under the Nose: The story I told myself about their rejection… definitely hurt.
Chin: I thought I had to fix myself.
Collarbone: Don’t I have to MAKE myself likable to them… to EVERYONE?
Under the Arm: What if I don’t?
Top of the Head: Maybe they are not my true tribe…
Eyebrow: But I want to feel accepted by them!
Side of the Eye: What if it’s okay to be rejected?
Under the Eye: It’s okay to filter out others who don’t fit with me.
Under the Nose: It’s okay for us not to be a match.
Chin: Part of me still thinks I HAVE TO fit in with everyone.
Collarbone: What if that isn’t true?
Under the Arm: I don’t really WANT to fit in with everyone!
Top of the Head: I choose to know what’s right for ME.
Eyebrow: And honor that I am not right for everyone…
Side of the Eye: Nor is everyone right for me.
Under the Eye: Rejection is starting to look… okay…
Under the Nose: In a world with billions of choices!
Chin: Selection and filtering are useful and healthy.
Collarbone: I appreciate those that share my life.
Under the Arm: And I have decided to honor and respect…
Top of the Head: Those who make other choices… For I LOVE Freedom!
Take a deep breath.
Join us and break out of your shell today!
Thank you so much. This perspective gives such a sense of relief, and feels, to me, like shrugging off a huge burden. I love your approach and truly value all the ‘free stuff’ that you make available. With much appreciation and best wishes. Sue
“This perspective gives such a sense of relief, and feels, to me, like shrugging off a huge burden.” We’re so glad, Sue!
Rick,
I love your phrase “divine filtering.” Indeed the no’s we both give and receive help us to get matched up with the “right” people.
“Those who say NO leave room for those who feel YES!”
Best damn sentance I have read in a logn time. Really made the penny drop for me! THANKS!!
BTW YES from me!