Do the energetics that exist at the time of our conception, gestation, and birth have an effect on our emotional balance and beliefs years later? I can tell you from working with several clients over the past year that pre-birth and birth stories can represent fertile ground for tapping with EFT.
What I’ve done with clients is “make up” a story, using whatever facts are known as well as lots of conjecture, around conception, time in the womb, birth, and the early pre-verbal years. We then tap on the emotions and body sensations that arise as we tell the story. This type of work can help relieve feelings, even those as intense as “I shouldn’t exist” or “the world doesn’t want me.”
I was reading an article by Silvia Hartman on Gary Craig’s EFT website. Silvia has a number of possible EFT setup approaches one can use to explore these issues. Here’s Silvia:
Conception and pregnancy
Consider the baby that was conceived and that would grow up to become you. What were the circumstances of this? Is there anything that comes to mind for this time period—any sense, emotion, word, or statement you were told about that has stayed with you and still causes discomfort? Example opening statements include:
- Even though this baby should never have been born, I now deeply and profoundly love and welcome this baby.
- Even though this baby was unwanted, I now deeply and profoundly love, accept and welcome this baby.
- Even though this baby’s mother drank all through pregnancy, I now deeply and profoundly love and welcome this baby.
- Even though it was said that this baby was born under an unlucky star, I now deeply and profoundly love and welcome this baby.
You might like to do another round after such statements have been completed, using the generic setup statement:
I now deeply and completely HEAL this baby.
If these opening statements cause you much distress, it might be best to do this process with another person to help guide and support you.
Birth
Birth is always a very dramatic experience. You might remember something, have a feeling or sense of something that happened then, or have been told difficult things about this time. Example opening statements include:
- Even though this baby caused his/her mother so much pain and suffering, I now deeply and profoundly forgive and love this baby.
- Even though this baby was born too early, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept this baby.
- Even though this baby nearly died, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept this baby.
Following the birth statements, I would advise appending each round with:
I now deeply and profoundly heal this baby from all wounds he/she might have sustained at the time of birth.
Birth to six months
This is a critical stage in the life of a child. Constant caretaking, attention, love, warmth, and feeding are of the essence for this child to grow up strong and confident. There are those who say that the most basic ideas and concepts, below the threshold of conscious awareness or words and pictures, are formed during this time. Example opening statements include:
- Even though this baby never received enough love, I now deeply and profoundly love this baby.
- Even though this baby was left alone in the dark, I now deeply and profoundly love and embrace this baby.
- Even though this baby was so helpless, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept responsibility for this baby.
- Even though this baby was always screaming, I now deeply and profoundly love and nourish this baby.
I would advise appending each round with:
I now deeply and profoundly heal this baby from the wounds he/she sustained at that fragile time.
Six months to two years
Entirely reliant on caretakers, the child now begins their own explorations of the world. Their experiences during this time—including toilet training—are said to shape basic beliefs about what can and cannot be had, done, or learned, as well as how relationships are constructed. Example opening statements include:
- Even though this child was not allowed to explore, I now deeply and profoundly love and encourage this child.
- Even though this child was ignored, I now deeply and profoundly acknowledge and love this child.
- Even though this child was totally overwhelmed by the world, I now deeply and profoundly love and take responsibility for this child.
- Even though this child was pushed on way too fast, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept this child.
Append a round with:
I now heal this child, deeply and profoundly, from all the injuries it sustained during this time of life.
Two to six years
This is the time of development of the basic sense of self—who we are and what our place is in the world. Many unhelpful self-concepts may be formed during this time, including through first contacts with organized learning. Example opening statements include:
- Even though this child was a girl, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept this child.
- Even though this child was slow to learn, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept this child.
- Even though this child was said to have been “a little monster,” I now deeply and profoundly love and accept this child.
- Even though this child was abused, I now deeply and profoundly love and treasure this child.
- Even though this child was different, I now deeply and profoundly love and treasure this child.
As always, append each round with:
I now heal all the injuries this child sustained during this time, deeply and profoundly, with my love.
Onward to maturity
Of course, change and learning do not stop when we are six years old. It may be valuable to continue and create your own custom line of growth beyond age six, into the pre-teen and teenage years, until you reach a point where maturity and adulthood feel established.
Many of us—age 40, 50, 60, and beyond—have never really felt as though we attained adulthood. Many actively fight that state because the people presented to us as models of adulthood were not what we would ever want to become. It is my supposition that Inner Child explorations, and more specifically Inner Child Healing, can help accomplish this.
By taking responsibility in a true adult fashion—not as modeled by the so-called “grown-ups” around us—we are both healing past wounds and recreating a whole new model of adulthood for our own past selves. How can you heal others if you cannot heal yourself? How can you forgive others if you cannot forgive yourself? How can you serve others if you cannot serve yourself?
It is often said that “loving the self” precedes all endeavors to love others. Loving the child you once were is an essential component of understanding the nature of love, forgiveness, and healing. I offer you these protocols for use with yourself and your clients, with my sincere wishes for deep healing and realignment. —Silvia Hartmann