Rejection is a big block to moving forward in our power.
Dealing with Rejection: He Doesn’t Want To See Me! (with Inner Tapping)
Watch the video or read and tap along. Or both, if you like!
We’ve all been hurt some time. The insecurity, the feeling of rejection when someone doesn’t want to see you can really bite you in the butt.
I actually had someone today tell me they were too busy to spend time with me. Even though I really got that they were busy, it brought up some of that all hurt. Our feelings don’t have to be logical. In fact, sometimes when the hurt seems illogical or unreasonable… it is then we can make the most progress with tapping!
I’d like to do some tapping with you so that we can release that old hurts and feel more resilient if that happens to you!
Remember, our primitive brain thinks that if we’re rejected, we’re no longer safe. Our tribe may be deserting us, leaving us to be lion food…
A lot of us have the story that we’re not lovable enough or not good enough, that other people are more valuable. We might have experienced or decided that one when we were little and our primitive brain is running rampant with it now, decades later.
Anytime something reminds us of that, it’s a big “ouch”! It resonates with our old pain so that two-year-old and a three-year-old or a five-year-old is just like, “Oh my God. I’m not Okay. I’m not lovable. I’m not going to be safe. No one’s going to ever love me!!!”
Just notice as I’m talking about that, what are you feeling in your body?
You can change adjectives or pronouns, obviously. But if you think, “He doesn’t want to see me,” or “She doesn’t want to see me,” what do you notice?
There’s old sadness behind my eyes and my heart feels kind of heavy. What are you noticing? What do you feel? Just pay attention to that. We’ll do some tapping on it. Put your feet on the ground and take a nice deep breath.
Karate Chop: Even though he doesn’t want to see me and that really hurts…Maybe I’m okay anyway…even though he doesn’t want to see me.
Even though that makes me feel very sad… It makes me want to cry. Maybe I can love myself right now and I can nurture myself through this.
Even though he rejected me and that really hurts. I feel like my heart is breaking. I send love to my heart and I let my heart know that I’m safe now. I have plenty of love to share with it.
Top of the Head: My heart feels hurt.
Eyebrow: It feels rejected.
Side of the Eye: It feels like I’ll never be loved again.
Under the Eye: All my insecurities have come back.
Under the Nose: I thought I’ve gotten rid of some of these.
Chin: But I’m taking care of myself right now.
Collarbone: I’m tapping on this hurt…
Under the Arm: And that’s releasing some more.
Top of the Head: I’m teaching my primitive brain that I’m safer than I think.
Eyebrow: Even though I don’t feel loved…
Side of the Eye: I’m actually loving me right now.
Under the Eye: And that’s something I didn’t know how to do back then.
Under the Nose: Maybe he doesn’t want to see me tonight.
Chin: And that makes me think everything is OVER… FOREVER.
Collarbone: But that’s really the old wound that’s hurting me.
Under the Arm: I have a lot more friends now.
Top of the Head: And I can learn to make others.
Take a deep breath, and notice what you’re feeling.
For some people, that tapping will have soothed the pain. You could feel really resilient and good.
For other people, you might have old ache coming up. Usually, when we have intense feelings like that, they’re resonant from a really traumatic time. It could have been a two-year-old who’s father rejected her, or a four-year-old who’s mother yelled at him, or someone who was divorced recently is feeling the rejection of their partner leaving.
Go back to the time that really hurts and just imagine the younger you… Whether it’s last week, last month, or 40 to 60 years ago. Imagine that younger you right there in front of you. Imagine that you walk back in time and you kneel down beside her, sit down beside her and ask her if you can do some kind of silly stuff that might help her feel better and see what she says.
Now, if she or he says no, don’t tap on them. We want to respect boundaries and give them the choice that helps them feel safe… whether they’re younger versions of us, energetic versions of us, or are humans that we interact with.
If they say no, just go ahead and tap on yourself for this. If they want to listen, they can. If they say yes, imagine that you’re gently picking up their hand and tapping on them while you tap physically on yourself now.
We have a video tutorial on this technique called inner tapping at https://www.thrivingnow.com/innertapping.
Karate Chop: (Again, imagine that you’re tapping on at younger self if she said yes.) Hey, sweetheart. I’m so sorry that you’re hurting.
I know this is really hard and it reminds you of times that you’ve really hurt.
I’m here with you now, and I’ve come back in time to help you. You really matter to me, and I want you to feel better.
Top of the Head: I know this really hurts.
Eyebrow: You felt trapped all that time ago.
Side of the Eye: You felt so confused.
Under the Eye: And you weren’t sure what was wrong with you.
Under the Nose: Maybe nothing was every wrong with you.
Chin: Maybe that other person was busy or distracted.
Collarbone: It was never you.
Under the Arm: What if you are lovable?
Top of the Head: And get to be loved now.
Take a nice deep breath and notice how that feels.
Look at that younger self and notice what she needs. Ask her what she wants. Does she want a blanket? Does she want something to drink? Does she want a teddy bear to hold or a puppy or kitten to play with? They can have their own energy puppy or kittens. In energy space, you don’t actually have to walk it or clean up after it. It’s great!
Tune in with her and see what she wants. Invite her to look around your world now because your world now, even if you are divorced a month ago, your world has changed. It’s safer.
When we realize that the trauma, the hurt was in the past, we start to heal. When we’re stuck in the present time with old hurt, it’s really hard. When you’re neck deep in it’s really hard to start healing from it.
Do some gentle work with the younger self, you can do more tapping, you can just invite them to watch TV with you or just spend time in your world. Be safe and loved, cuddle with them.
If this type of tapping engages your mind and heart, we want to invite you to experience first-hand the power of tapping together with me, with Rick, and with others who share the intention to really thrive in life and love… (and we laugh quite a bit together, too. 🙂 ) Drop us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org. Tell us what you would most like to transform in your life right NOW… and we’ll get started, together!