After a period of intense sadness, fear, or uncertainty, we may learn to press the emotional volume down. It can bring temporary stability. Then something good approaches and we discover that excitement, possibility, and joy have also become difficult to feel.
The system did not selectively mute only what hurt. It narrowed the range.
Joy May Feel Like Another Form of Risk
Excitement changes the body: more energy, quicker breath, anticipation, openness. Those sensations can resemble anxiety. If activation itself has become unsafe, joy may be pushed down before we consciously recognize it.
There may also be protective beliefs:
- If I get excited, I will be disappointed.
- If I feel good, I will stop watching for danger.
- If I let joy in, the sadness will overwhelm me too.
- Good feelings never last, so why begin?
We do not need to force ourselves into happiness. We can help the body tolerate a small breeze of good feeling without demanding that it stay forever.
A Few Seconds Count
Emotional capacity often grows through brief, successful experiences. A spontaneous few seconds of warmth or possibility is not “only” a few seconds. It is evidence that the door can open.
When it happens, pause. Notice where the pleasant sensation lives. Let the body receive positive feedback rather than immediately comparing the moment with the permanent joy you wish you had.
Worry and happiness may coexist. Nervousness may contain a strand of excitement. Range does not require one emotion to eliminate all the others.
Tapping: It Is Safe to Let Some Good Feeling Through
Side of the Hand: Even though I learned to squash the painful feelings, I understand why joy and excitement may have been flattened too.
Even though good feelings can make me vulnerable to disappointment, I am not asking them to last forever.
Even though activation can feel like anxiety, I am willing to notice whether some of this energy is possibility.
Top of the Head: I turned the volume down.
Eyebrow: There was too much sadness.
Side of the Eye: There was too much uncertainty.
Under the Eye: My body tried to steady me.
Under the Nose: It also quieted the excitement.
Chin: I appreciate the protection.
Collarbone: We can experiment with a little more range.
Under the Arm: A few seconds of good feeling count.
Top of the Head: I can allow this small breeze.
Eyebrow: I do not have to capture it.
Side of the Eye: I do not have to make it permanent.
Under the Eye: My body can learn from pleasure too.
Under the Nose: Worry and happiness can both be present.
Chin: Nervousness may include excitement.
Collarbone: I can widen gently.
Under the Arm: It is safe to let some joy move through.
Take a breath. Recall one recent moment that felt even slightly good. Stay with the physical sensation for two unhurried breaths.
Signs of Coming Out of Alarm
Yawning, sighing, warmth, digestive sounds, or a fuller breath can appear as the nervous system shifts toward rest and digest. They are not universal proof of healing, but they may signal that the body no longer believes it must maintain the same level of alarm.
If numbness, depression, or anxiety is persistent or severe, appropriate professional care matters. This practice is not a substitute for it.
We are simply teaching the system that feeling more does not have to mean drowning. Sadness can receive care. Joy can receive space. Neither has to own the whole sky.
Session Audio
This Guide was adapted from a Thriving Now session with Rick Wilkes and Cathy Vartuli, recorded December 16, 2015. The transcript was generated automatically and may contain errors.