50% of everything you do... isn't as good as the other half.
The first time I heard this, it was like a punch in the gut. Oh no, it's true. Half of everything I do isn't any good. Arrgh! And then I had to smile because...
This is always mathematically true. Isn't it?!?
By whatever measure that we have, 50% will fall on one side of that measure and half will fall on the other. 50/50. Half and half.
But, you know, there's a part of me that really didn't get that. I think because I was raised in a certain way and to be a high achiever, to be a perfectionist (I've recovered mostly from that), it means that there's a part of me that always expects everything that I do, including this podcast, to be in the top, at least 50%. But that's not possible.
(Listen for a couple of examples... and how you can find relief and freedom)
19 - 50% of everything you do... isn't as good as the other half.
[00:00:06] Rick@Thrivingnow.center: The first time I heard this, it was like a punch in the gut. Oh no, it's true. Half of everything I do isn't any good. Arrgh!
[00:00:16] And then I had to smile because this is always mathematically true. Isn't it?
[00:00:21]By whatever measure that we have, 50% will fall on one side of that measure and half will fall on the other. 50/50. Half and half.
[00:00:34]But, you know, there's a part of me that really didn't get that. I think because I was raised in a certain way and to be a high achiever, to be a perfectionist (I've recovered mostly from that), it means that there's a part of me that always expects everything that I do, including this podcast, to be in the top, at least 50%. But that's not possible.
[00:01:01]A couple of examples.
[00:01:02] So let's take a podcast. A podcast is an act of creativity. And if you do a podcast, two episodes, one by some measure is going to be better than the other. For example, this is episode number 19 of the Emotional Freedom for All podcast.
[00:01:27] If I look at the podcasts that I've already done, the first 18, based upon number of listeners, guess what? 50% of them did not do as well as the other half.
[00:01:41]Does that mean the half that didn't do as well, aren't as... what? Meaningful?
[00:01:49]Well, like in terms of meaningfulness, to me... one of the podcasts that has had the fewest listeners actually is one that is still so meaningful to me. I listen to it. It reminds me. It's got a term in it: heart-adopted that really lives in me that came out through doing that podcast.
[00:02:14]I know that term has been meaningful to at least two other listeners in a way that really touched them. But in terms of number of listeners, guess what? It's in the bottom 50%.
[00:02:29]What about, about how it impacts you? Now if you've listened to more than one, if you've listened to two or more podcasts that I've done, guess what? Half of them will have had more meaningfulness to you than the other. Half of them would be a little more entertaining, uplifting than the other half. Now, maybe on the spectrum...
[00:02:52] and this is, I think the important thing. Maybe on the spectrum it's still a satisfying experience. It's still acceptable. It's something that you've chosen to invest some of your time and energy. Thank you. It's great to have you with us.
[00:03:05]Now, this applies again to everything we do.
[00:03:11]If you're a professional and you work with clients, you could be a massage therapist, a coach, an accountant, a lawyer, 50% of those sessions that you do by some measure, aren't going to be as good as the other half.
[00:03:30] Now, if that measure is like how good it felt to do the session, that's different than the measure of how impactful it was for the client. If the measure is how much money did I make off of that client session or that client engagement versus another guess what? Half and half. They're going to fall across a spectrum.
[00:03:53]It even goes to things like hugs and kisses. You know, if you measure your hugs and kisses by how much connection you get or tingles or a sense of co-regulation or how it brings you closer or not, how you felt afterwards, how satisfied you were, guess what they're going to fall across the spectrum.
[00:04:18] If you make up stories, half the stories that you make up, aren't going to feel a certain way compared to the other half.
[00:04:27]You could use something neutral, like how long it is. Half my podcasts aren't as long as the other half. They're all in a range, but half of them are shorter than the other half, half are longer than the other 50%.
[00:04:42] Do you see what I'm getting at here? The problem is, is that our primitive brain says, Oh, Oh, I'm comparing, I'm comparing, I'm judging. I'm comparing, I'm comparing. Half of what I do, doesn't compare to the, to the other half.
[00:04:56] And this is just an internal thing. We of course can be comparing to others. When we are exploring emotional freedom for ourselves, looking at that dynamic within ourselves is a great place to start.
[00:05:10] In this one, I believe that there's relief.
[00:05:14] Guess what? You can't actually be a perfectionist! 50% of what you and I do can't be as good as the other half. It's mathematically impossible. We can't do identical acts of creation. We're human beings.
[00:05:34] We don't show up at work the same way every day. If you take a hundred days at whatever you call work, some days are gonna leave you more depleted than others. Some are going to leave you more inspired than others. Some are going to leave you feeling like you're part of a team more than other days.
[00:05:53]This is okay.
[00:05:55]If you can't actually be a perfectionist... whew! Thank goodness!
[00:06:01]There's also relief in it's not always about getting the A++.
[00:06:06] Our schools, at least the ones that I went through, you were being graded based upon some standard. I believe that that trained my brain to look at being, and aspiring to be, in the top at least 10%. Uh, but when you're looking at your own work, ah, it's terrible to do that.
[00:06:30] It blocks you. As soon as you've done two, three, four things, you can start to feel the spectrum of your work. But it doesn't mean that it's not work that matters.
[00:06:41] It doesn't mean that your Heartistry isn't acceptable... and welcomed.
[00:06:48]That's where the freedom comes in.
[00:06:50] I believe that as you really embrace this spectrum, this range, and the measures that we can have from everything that we do, that you get to live and express your heartistry knowing it is mathematically designed to exist on multiple spectrums:
[00:07:08] How it feels to you when you do it, how it feels to others, how it feels a month later, how much money it makes, how much closer in connection you become, the energy you get from it, and the emotional labor it requires. It's all going to be on a spectrum.
[00:07:29] Now, there is a way to avoid this.
[00:07:34] Never. Do. Anything.
[00:07:39] If you never do anything, if you stay stuck, if you stay frozen, if you're afraid of 50% of the work that you do not being as good on some measure as the other half, well, you avoid this. And it would be a tragedy.
[00:07:59] I believe that this life was designed for you to feel free to express your heartistry.
[00:08:08]I'm Rick from ThrivingNow, and we're here to support you in that. We have a community that's growing and you are so welcome. Visit us at Thrivingnow.center. Thanks for listening.
Until next time, I'm Rick at Thrivingnow. My inbox is open at Rick@EmotionalFreedom.Love. Or visit EmotionalFreedom.Love and leave a comment if you want to explore this together. We also have a community center forum where we'd love to have you meet with us! Thanks for listening.
Episode 19 ~ Emotional Freedom for All Podcast