Law of Attraction: Finding a Balance
Have you been told that “being positive” means ignoring anything “negative” in your life? Have you heard that to use the Law of Attraction, you can never EVER think a negative thought?
Horse manure.
There is a world of difference between dwelling on a negative for days, weeks, months, or years and being aware of something you want to shift. Activating the Law of Attraction to bring us abundance of any kind—love, money, success—is not about ignoring reality. Try holding a beach ball under water. It takes time, focus, and energy, and it gets tiring after a while. The darn thing keeps popping to the surface when we least want it to!
Abe (www.abraham-hicks.com) uses the analogy of an empty gas gauge…
Say we’re stuck on the side of the road, out of gas.
Slapping a happy face sticker over the empty gas gauge is not going to get us anywhere. It isn’t going to get the tank filled or get us a ride. Pretending with all our might that we’re at our destination already won’t magically put us there. If someone stopped and offered a ride, would you say, “No thanks. I am focusing on the tank being full, and I’m going to sit here until it fills up.” ??
Getting out of the car and stomping, swearing, and kicking the car won’t do much to help either. Someone passing by may also be less inclined to stop while we are in the middle of a furious outburst.
This is where tapping comes in. Tap on the panic, anger, or blame that’s coming up. Acknowledge the negative emotions and release them. Once we quiet the inner noise, we are better able to make calm and connected decisions. Ideas will start to flow.
For example, we can make a phone call if we have a cell phone. We can look around to see if there is someplace we can walk to get help. If neither is an option (say we’re out of cell range and there aren’t any houses or businesses nearby), we can put the hood up so people know we need help. We can decide if it feels right to try walking forward or going back. So we are looking at the current reality – but not DWELLING on the negative. We are vibrationally OPEN to solutions.
Say that the best decision seems to be to wait until help arrives. While we wait, we can do some tapping to ask the Universe to help us and to soothe whatever stress might be coming up.
At this point, staying focused on the problem isn’t helpful. We have looked squarely at the issue. We’ve tapped. We’re a bit more calm and centered. We asked. We took the action we could take. Now we allow.
We allow by intentionally focusing our attention on the positive around us. “So nice that I can bring myself relief in such a surprising situation.” “I sure appreciate how comfy this car seat is! It’s so much better than sitting in a rocky dusty anthill on the side of the road.” “That breeze feels good.” And we can look forward to thanking and appreciating our rescuers.
Can you feel how in this situation we have INTENTIONALLY moved from the negative contrast of being out of gas to a place where our vibration is at least neutral (and maybe even calm and content)? The universe can feel that openness. It matches us, by Law of Attraction, with people who want to be appreciated and to be helpers in the world.
Compare that to a person who is stuck in the negative. Reacting out of panic. Anger. Gloom and doom. 1) It is much harder to make good decisions from that place, and 2) we aren’t enjoying life or very open to possibilities. Even if both people had to wait the same amount of time for a tow truck, whose body feels light and relaxed, and whose is stressed, exhausted, and becoming ill? Who has energy to complete the journey in a safe and fun way? Who feels pretty good about themselves?
And it takes a whopping dose of denial to pretend that you are not stuck at the side of the road out of gas. You are. Pretending it’s otherwise is fantasy, not Law of Attraction. Contrast can activate us, focus us, and bring out the best in us. Denial just leaves energies to fester.
So how does this apply to emotional and physical pain? When the pain is long-standing and based on deeply held beliefs and traumas, we typically can’t just “tap it away” in a few rounds. So we set aside some time for us each day (or as feels right to our body) to look squarely at where we are. Then tap on the emotions around our present situation and any underlying memories and traumas. We acknowledge where we are, and we take baby steps in the direction of where we want to be.
We can tap for guidance and take the actions we feel drawn to do: take a deep breath, get a massage, get a coaching session, take a nap, journal, walk, meditate… whatever is a YES for us.
Then we can turn it over to the Universe and appreciate what is good in our life rather than dwelling on the pain. We do know that can be very difficult when the pain is intense; we’re not saying you have to walk around with a smile on your face all the time. But most people have something they can appreciate, even if it’s that the pain is a tiny bit less right now, or the color of the curtains in the sun is rather pretty.
Finding that balance is not always graceful or smooth. Following body guidance and taking things in baby steps makes it easier. Practice. This is a skill you can develop.
If you want to explore the Law of Attraction further, we recommend this recording: