September 27, 2012 by Rick

Insecure in Relationships?

by Cathy Vartuli

Does insecurity rise up and try to swallow you in relationships?

Do you find yourself fighting fears… and spending too much energy and time trying to figure out how to keep your loved ones happy and connected with you?

Does the hurt… or the fear of hurt… keep you from being open?

Watch the new video by Cathy and Reid Mihalko:

I understand. For a long time, I avoided relationships as much as possible. They hurt. I felt like I could never win. And I spent so much time trying to make sure I gave enough value to “keep” my partner, I was always exhausted and sometimes grumpy.

I didn’t know what was going on. I thought I was bad at love. I tried not to care, because as soon as someone mattered to me, this “stuff” came up.

I didn’t even know what to call it. I knew it ruined some beautiful relationships with wonderful people. I knew it caused me intense pain… Nights spent crying and hurting and feeling completely alone.

I spent a lot of time hurting. And since I’m also a research scientist, I spent years reading and consulting with people to figure out what was “wrong” with me.

When I first figured it out, I didn’t like the answer. It was a word I’d avoided for a long time. I had been taught that nice girls didn’t do this…

What was it?

I was Jealous!

I had been brought up that jealousy was bad, uncontrollable, and should be hidden at all costs. But as anyone who does EFT/Tapping knows, if you don’t acknowledge something, it’s VERY hard to change it. I had shoved those feelings in the back of the darkest closet I could find and hoped that if I was very good, they would go away on their own.

They didn’t. But I did find tapping, and Rick and I studied traumas and limiting beliefs and learned to unravel them.

And Reid Mihalko shared his powerful understanding about jealousy with us. The peanut butter and the chocolate went together fabulously! I finally had an effective and empowered way to look at what I was feeling. And I could tap on the underlying beliefs that kept me feeling like the other shoe would drop at any moment.

These skills made my relationships so much easier. I have new depth, trust, and playfulness. You and your loved ones deserve to enjoy this, too. I wish my family could have taught me this when I was younger. It would have saved so much heartache!

If you’d like a straightforward and surprisingly simple way to transform how you feel in relationships, Reid and I put together an 8 minute video (with transcript) to give you insight and improve your relationships now!

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