I attended the annual Toronto Energy Psychology conference this month, and a lovely woman who participated in my Attracting Abundance class said “I have been tapping along with your DVD from Gary Craig’s specialty series 1, and the pounds just flew off!”
“Jane” lost 51 pounds and more importantly, HAS KEPT IT OFF FOR OVER A YEAR.
I interviewed Jane about her history and her theory of why the tapping worked for her. She never had a weight problem until her early thirties. She had had a series of dissatisfying relationships, and found herself quite angry when she hit the big “3 – 0.”
She started to gain weight out of her anger about the relationships, and against the confusion about wanting to get married. Then when September 11th happened, she rationalized as follows: “If this is going to be the end of the world, why would I waste my time dieting???” Once she discovered the tapping for her underlying feelings, she found weight loss easy and effortless.
The primary piece of family history that is significant for Jane is that her parents were incredibly angry and controlling, and she and her siblings always had to dress perfectly, say the right things, speak well, etc. She and her siblings were also forced to eat whatever was on their plates, no matter what, and while this didn’t lead to a weight problem as a child or early adult, it set the stage to rebel. From Jane: “We never knew when our parents’ anger would rage out of control and we would be given the belt or sent flying across the room. I survived by being invisible, responsible and the perfect student and daughter. I was brought up to never discuss or betray our family, not to trust anyone, and the guilt, shame, and self-loathing I felt was enormous.”
After age 30, Jane said she used food as a rebellion “to finally get back at my parents.” When I asked what the extra weight had been useful for, she said it kept the men away from her, helped her be emotionally invisible in her family and socially, and allowed her to be back in control. Food had definitely been used as a reward as well. Eating whatever she wanted made her feel deeply relieved of the pressure she had felt all her life to be perfect. In addition, her family looked down on and criticized overweight people, and becoming overweight later in life allowed her a feeling of anger and an “I’ll show you” feeling in response to their controlling personalities and demand for perfection.
In Jane’s words:
“By the time I was 30 I had a great job, but I couldn’t understand why friendships and relationships never worked out for me. I was so tired of the “perfect” role it was actually a relief to gain an enormous amount of weight, because it would be obvious to anyone looking at me that I wasn’t perfect. It was the “perfect” excuse for me to bow out of life and to isolate myself. I used food to sedate myself and I sleepwalked through life for sixteen years. I would lose weight and then gain it all back plus 10 more pounds. I would sabotage myself at every turn. My sister gave me Gary Craig’s manual on EFT and his website information, and I learned to tap and I ordered your weight loss DVD from the specialty series. I tapped along with the DVD just for practice and suddenly I started losing weight. I lost 50 pounds in six months and kept it off for a year.”
Since I had never met Jane before, I wanted to know some specifics about her tapping journey. She said she tapped along with everyone on stage during the specialty series DVD even if she didn’t share their issues. All her friends kept hounding her for her secret diet, and wanted to know exactly what she was eating or not eating. Please note, she has NEVER DIETED DURING HER TAPPING ADVENTURE. And she loves not feeling deprived. Diets had represented control to her as well, and she never felt right on them because of the extreme deprivation. Jane had yo-yo dieted in her 30’s maybe 6-7 times: down 50, up 50, down 60, up 65, over and over again.
Jane was so amazed at how quickly the pounds fell off without dieting, that at one point she actually feared she might be sick, maybe had cancer, and that’s why she was losing weight. She consulted her physician and found she is totally healthy.
Jane said, “Now I am ready to lose the next 50 pounds…”
In my professional opinion, the chances of her continued success are enormous, because she has obviously tapped for underlying feelings, not just food cravings, and is willing to do the work and has been diligent about tapping. As she kept complimenting me on the class I taught on the DVD, I tried to impress upon her the importance of the work she did for herself. Please note that this was not magic: Jane tapped and tapped over and over again for her issues and for her feelings. This is why “the pounds came flying off.”
I asked Jane if anything in the Attracting Abundance with EFT class that morning had resonated with her. Her response was as follows:
“During the Attracting Abundance Workshop I had an “AHA” moment when tapping about being stuck and not trying new things because if I can’t do something perfectly, I don’t want to do it at all. It was my old perfectionism rearing its ugly head. I was able to let that go and laugh about it. Also, I didn’t realize that I deep-down believed that good things happen to other people, not me, and then I was able to have lunch with you (Carol) and benefit from your help and advice and that shot down that limiting belief! Good things happen to me too! Then when I got home from the conference I returned a phone call from a friend and she offered me an opportunity to make extra income. I feel like the universe is showering me with abundance right now and it’s NOT a coincidence!”
My thanks to Jane, a model tapping student! — Carol Look
Rick comments: Jane did the work. She decided to make a change. She decided to address the underlying emotional issues. And I would also say she RELAXED into losing weight rather than pushing and forcing herself. It has been the same journey for clients of mine; when they address enough of the core stresses, the “excess stored energy” gets used to relaunch their life in a very positive direction.