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I’m drinking far more than I like or feel good about, but I have to fight myself to limit even a little bit. How can I use tapping to change this? –Emily
Excessive drinking… or anything else we turn to habitually for numbing comfort… is caused by emotional pain and confusion. And the behavior continues for as long as we feel we can’t deal with it any other way.
Healing the pain makes it easier to shift this (as does learning more empowered and useful patterns for self-soothing).
To heal the pain and confusion, a lot of tapping (EFT) helps. Each person has different sources and beliefs about the pain, but this video tutorial can give you a doorway into shifting them deeply and completely.
As we release the pain and learn about what confused us with tapping, we naturally tend to feel more empowered. Tapping is a useful tool. And hurting less gives us room to develop other naturally self-soothing habits.
What would you do for a friend who was stressed, upset, bored, lonely or hurting? You wouldn’t give her a drink every time would you? Yet, that is what a lot of people turn to (or chocolate cake, or a shopping spree, or a new relationship… the list goes on and on. The particular “addiction” may change, but the hurt underneath is the same).
Perhaps you might offer that friend a safe place to cry or vent her anger and feel her emotions. You might give her a cup of hot tea and a blanket to wrap herself in. You might give her hugs and a compassionate ear. You could offer to tap with her to help her feel better. What stops you from doing that for yourself now?
Having people you can turn to at any time can make a big difference in helping you feel safer. There are a lot of different groups out there. Our group coaching forum and library is available at any time. And we have regular calls where people can connect and heal together using EFT tapping sessions like this (feel free to change the language to fit the habit YOU want to change):
Karate Chop: Even though I learned that the BEST AND ONLY way to soothe myself and numb myself was to drink alcohol, and that might have been true back then, I am open to learning better ways to soothe myself and feel better.
Even though I have the habit of drowning my emotions in alcohol, they just keep piling up and making me feel worse and worse. What if I started healing them instead?
Even though alcohol worked for me for a long time, it isn’t working well for me now. I’m ready to try something new, including this silly tapping stuff.
Top of the Head: Alcohol did work.
Eyebrow: It worked for a long time.
Side of the Eye: If it didn’t, I wouldn’t have used it.
Under the Eye: But now it’s creating a bigger problem.
Under the Nose: I’m ready to find better solutions.
Chin: What if I don’t have to drown my emotions?
Collarbone: What if I am strong enough to feel them now…
Under the Arm: And heal them?
Top of the Head: I’m drinking more than I want to.
Eyebrow: It’s hard on my body and mind.
Side of the Eye: I still need comfort though…
Under the Eye: A way to feel better.
Under the Nose: I bet I can learn how to do that.
Chin: In fact, I’m comforting myself now!
Collarbone: I’m tapping on my feelings.
Under the Arm: I bet I can heal them, too.
Top of the Head: I don’t have to do it all at once.
Eyebrow: But I’m a smart person.
Side of the Eye: I can learn new ways to soothe myself.
Under the Eye: My brain thinks alcohol is the only way…
Under the Nose: But I let my mind and spirit know there are LOTS of other ways.
Chin: And we can find them together.
Collarbone: I am hurting.
Under the Arm: I can heal.
Top of the Head: I’m starting today.
Take a deep breath.
What does that bring up? Remember, you don’t have to do this alone. A private coach or support group can make the process smoother and more successful. If you do decide to join a group like Alcoholics Anonymous, we strongly encourage you to also use inner tapping to let go of old frozen traumas, too. We’re holding a Good Thought for you!